Sorry, Here and There.

Here I'm too soft, too fragile, too boring, I don't know how to do anything right, and too much of a goody two shoes. I don't know anything, and I always look like crap. I'm just not tough enough.

There I'm too harsh, too mean, so not smart enough, and every time something happens it's most definitely my fault, I don't do anything and it's all because I'm too lame, I never live in the real world, and I'm never good enough.

Sorry. I guess.

I'm sorry. That in trying to be nicer, I became softer. I'm sorry that I just can't seem to meet anyone's standards of living life the "right way". I'm sorry that even though I like how I look, I always look like crap to you. I'm sorry I remembered how to cry again. I'm sorry I was always better at entertaining myself than the rest of the world. I'm sorry that I can't seem to fix all your problems. I'm sorry I like to dream up world's and stories of unbelievable places. I am sorry that no matter how hard I try I always fall short of everyone's expectations. I'm sorry I don't value the same things the rest of the world does. I am so sorry that I take forever to do something, because I'm making sure it won't bother the people I care most about.
I am so sorry, that occasionally I like to be just me.

I. am. so. damn. sorry.

Update.

Everything starts this year, for me at least. Currently I am in my hometown, wasting away 90% of my days, to spend 10% with the people I love. I love my family, but I'm bored out of my mind. My dad has to work most of the time, and my sister is agreeable maybe 4 hours of the day in total (and even then your usually skirting the angry defensive temper just below the surface). My grandma, is lonely and bored as well, but she is grouchy and annoyingly reminiscent of things she's told me a hundred times over. And even though I'm probably one of the most patient people in my family, even my patience, can only endure the same story so many times. I love her to pieces, but it's a little hard to deal with her. Though fourth of July was wonderful, due to being around so much family, now it is over, and those who could resume their normal lives, did. While I am stuck in limbo, half-haeartedly trying to entertain myself. I hope everyone else, is having a good summer, and had a awesome fourth of July. Here are some pictures from my 4th of July. :)